People in  Morocco say "if you are an adult, you have to work and make your own money". But how?  If you can't find a job or make enough money with jobs that have bad conditions.

                My childhood was happy as whole. I lived in a poor area where all the neighbors knew each other, so there were more emotions, more feelings. We were like a big family. But when I grew up everything had changed. Many families moved from the area where I lived  . Many friends  left school early. Now they have their own  jobs and own families. But me, who  spent a long time in school, university and the institute,  I  still couldn't get a better job or own a home .

 

          

            I started hating myself, especially when I was doing nothing, and when my father came back from hard work, very exhausted. I kissed his hand, then I left home so I could be alone. I asked myself  "What  am I going to  do?" .       

            When I kissed his hand I was following a tradition of Arab children, and where I grew up people did it , but that time my kiss was different. It meant a lot . It meant "I am sorry dad. Your hope was disappointed in your son who has lack of gumption, and now he is only able to eat ,sleep and go to toilet." I felt sorry because I knew my father who had a tough childhood had to work hard even when his  hair became white and his back ached all the time. Really just thinking about that time hurts me.

           In  fact, one year before I came to the United States  it was the hardest time ever in my life. I was very depressed. Mostly, when I realized that the Arab revolutions or The Arab Spring couldn't be successful. The  Peaceful revolutions were changed to  blood pools by the Arab dictators who didn't care about their people and their countries. They only cared about themselves and their positions .

 

           After moving among companies where my humanity was stolen, working over time for little pay, with people  who didn't believe in each other, screaming all the time where you have to be like a slave to the boss. My mind was very dispersion among my  job , Arab Spring revolutions and getting the visa  .  Many people told me don't go to The USA because life there is difficult and expensive after the economic  crisis.

          My mind was changed when I met someone who was waiting for the green card like me .His conditions were more difficult than mine , but he was focused on going to the  USA. He told me don't believe what people say.  The USA is the best  country in the world . The USA is the future. I believed in him, then I put all my hopes in getting my visa and moving to the USA as soon as possible .